Pregnancy Sucks

And anyone who says differently is a dirty, stinking liar! There is nothing fun about being pregnant from beginning to end. It's physically miserable and emotionally draining. Who usually tells you great pregnancy stories? Old ladies. I'm sorry, but senility must have set in because you've forgotten the truth.

I'm not saying there aren't perks. It's neat to feel them moving, it's a beautiful concept that you're growing a person, but these "ah-ha" moments are not enough for me to say "Pregnancy is so wonderful and magical. The best thing that will ever happen to you!" BS! I say to anyone who has uttered a sentence similar to that. How are women supposed to feel like they can make it through one of the crappiest experiences in life when they feel like their experience is different from everyone elses? That's total crap. Be real people!

I'm not saying tell women horror stories about the things that can and do go wrong, but warn them: You're going to feel miserable! You're going to be angry and then cry for no reason at all! You'll be so uncomfortable you won't be able to sleep! You'll look in a mirror and think - AH! That's not me! Jenny McCarthy wrote a book on pregnancy. I read it while waiting for my oldest to make her appearance. Good thing I did because she warns of some things I would have freaked out about had I not read it in her book before they happened! I'm trying to remember what she called one of them, blue twinkie? Read the book, you'll understand.

I think birth is far cooler than pregnancy. Still crappy, painful, and miserable at times, but far more interesting and uplifting than 9 months of constant misery. And I've had a 36 hour labor so that means something! Also the last time I gave birth the nurses were gauking at the screen in shock I was having three minute long, intense contractions with only a 15 second break in between and still not ready for her to exit the womb. I still would take another labor like that over being pregnant again. I'm so done! Four is my limit physically and mentally. If you see me after this year and I'm pregnant again you have the right the slap me and say, "What were you thinking???!!!"

Anyway to those of you out there wondering why you're the only woman who hated being pregnant I just wanted to say - you're not alone! Any woman that says otherwise cannot be trusted. They are not being honest or their brain is so far gone they can't remember that far back.